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Finding Peace in a PLURless Place

Posted on January 08 2020

Finding Peace in a PLURless Place
As we navigate through our lives, we come across an infinite amount of challenges, lessons, and obstacles. Equally, we can find an infinite amount of resources to "achieve happiness", or "find peace" in those times. Guides, lists, YouTube videos, books, audiotapes... you get it.
With every breath we take, we are in the power to choose how the next moment will unfold for us. Mix in a little circumstance and cosmic influence, and you have a delicious cocktail of Chance, Fate, and Control.

Model: Maria
All these elements play such an important role into how we become. Learning how to balance them to bring about harmony is difficult, and it's natural we seek a little assistance from those who appear to have it all together. Emphasis on the word "APPEAR". So, we find inspiration in the words and actions of those who we see at the level of peace, love, happiness we wish to see ourselves at... but what we often forget is that what we see in others is a reflection of what we see in ourselves. That by simply being inspired, we are already in love, in peace, in joy. We already see ourselves living as the best versions of ourselves. We're just so conditioned to DO more, be MORE. With a yearning, we chase our own tails in these endeavors.
There is no shame in that. And maybe, to some, there is no truth in that either. Your experience is so unique, and all people can offer through those guides and lists and books and videos is an outreach of solidarity. To let us know that we are not alone in our emotions of wanting to find peace when peace may not be present.
I remember there was a time in my life where all I would do was constantly recall all the terrible things that were happening to me. I was homeless, had been jumped, robbed, and the list went on as the days went on and it felt like I was a magnet calling out only to all the things that could hurt me. It got to a point where I almost enjoyed the pity I'd receive, so I'd just keep telling the same story, committing to the same narrative. This narrative had characters that played a role in maintaining the destructive cycle I kept myself in, and healing from that involved a lot of work, work such as physically moving away from what I knew, cancelling friendships that were toxic in both directions and other uncomfortable, unglamorous things. Finding PEACE in this... PEACELESS time of my life... required work that I am still doing to this day, 6 years later.
Repair isn't achieved; it's maintained. 
If you want some tips and tricks on how to find peace, there is one important thing you must know:
Peace isn't found; it's created.
Reborn from an innate birthright to be at ease with yourself and your surroundings. 
You can create this peace by spending genuine time with yourself.
Checking in DAILY with your physical body, mental body, and emotional. These bodies that I speak of make up your entire identity while only scratching the surface of your divine truth.
Physical body check ins can include:
  • Moisturizing your skin slowly, feeling into your muscles and noticing what sensations are there. Any tension, any softness. Any anything.
  • Identify and distinguish pain and discomfort.
  • 10 minutes of basic stretches in the morning, even before you roll out of bed. Stretching the arms overhead, flexing the feet, rolling out the ankles and wrists, hugging the knees to your chest.... subtle movements to start the conversation between you and your physical body


Mental & emotional body check ins:
  • JOURNAL. Whether it be in an actual journal or the note app on your phone. Write down WHAT you are feeling and how.
  • Take a Needs and Values assessment online. You can find one here. These assessments allow you to understand the difference between needs and values and help you know yourself a little better.
  • Organize any tasks you *think* you need to do for the day, and do what you can, and not a thing more.
  • Separate the feeling from the self. Instead of saying, "I am feeling sad." try saying, "There is sadness present." Then, identify WHERE in your body you feel this emotion. For example, when I feel anxious, I feel tightness in my chest.

Congratulate yourself on the small victories, and the big ones, too. Shit, Congratulate yourself on the losses cus that takes guts and you survived something. 
Allow yourself to be inspired. Give yourself permission to feel wholly and without shame.
You got this.


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